mountainboard event sustanance

First off, by far the easiest solution is to use the on-site burger van for all your meals. This is great because there's no need to shop, cook or worry about food going off before you can cook it. The one down side is it's probably going to work out expensive and there will be some queuing involved, so maybe it's not the best option after all.

Also don't forget you will be marooned in the middle of nowhere for the comp and relying on one food source is likely to end badly if the catering van doesn't turn up when you expect it to or the level of demand takes them completely by surprise and they go home early (these things are rare, but both have happened).

Oh yeah, and all that grease won't be very good for keeping you at the peak of your fitness either, so maybe it would be better to take something for breakfast at least (pots of rice pudding are a good option here) then you can get your burger on for the other two meals.

But hang on - if the weather is nice and there is a crew of you, you could have a BBQ. Cook a bit of fresh food, have a few cold ones (which if the weather is nice will probably be luke warm ones) and chill with mates after a day's riding. Plus the added bonus is the embers from the BBQ will give you the base for your fire for when it gets dark. Sorted.

Now before you grab the halloumi cheese and start stuffing peppers, beers getting luke warm is not too much of a problem but meat that has been gently warming in your car isn't going to be very good for you or taste nice. Apart from a BBQ and charcoal you are going to need a cold box/bag with some freezer blocks, which will mean you should get some cold beer as well. It also means you should be able to keep a bit of milk cold if you want the odd cuppa.

If you do want a good cup of splosh then a kettle and stove is going to be required, which isn't a bad thing because that means you can now sample the tasteful delights of every students favourite food, the Pot Noodle. If you are feeling particularly adventurous you can always take it up to full meal level by adding some fresh veggies ( shrooms, peppers, spring onions, carrot etc ). Take out the noodle block, chuck in your veg, put noodles back, add your boiling water, sorted.

This will mean you are getting dangerously close to really cooking, so if you are prepared to go that far you should find it only a small step further to pick up some fresh pasta and sauce the next time you are at the supermarket. Since you are now heading in a healthy direction you could also top it off with a bit of salad. So get one of those salad bags, rip the top off and chow down on the leaves. It's like a big bag of crisps, only good for you. Maybe you could even chuck in a bit of salad dressing, and you can use the same fork as your customised noodlage.

There are of lots other ready made meals available of course, and I don't mean microwave meals here. I'm talking about the pre-packed stuff like sandwiches, sausage rolls and Cornish pasties (some say Devon pasties are better but it's widely agreed that this was just an admin error). Ok, the first two are probably more suited to freeride one-day missions, but the ever-handy Cornish pasty is going to be ideal for grabbing when you are looking for lunch and can't be bothered to stand in line at the burger van.

Now, there is a cunning trick if you want your pasty warm at lunchtime. Obviously you won't have access to an oven or other artificial heat source so place your pasty in direct sunshine and by lunchtime it nicely warmed through - it's just like warming up your solar shower!

For best results leave on top of a car dashboard as the full glare of sun is intensified by the windscreen. You can also improve the heating process by purchasing the classic Ginsters Cornish pasty (available at practically every petrol station) which come in black packaging. One word of warning here - don't forget your pasty and leave it heating for two days underneath your windscreen. You will turn your pasty nasty and the last thing you want to do is spend a day in a portaloo...  It is also worth remembering that any kind of solar heating is best avoided with anything which contains chicken or fish and the jury's out as to whether coleslaw sarnies taste better after a day spent on the dash board.

Of course the humble sandwich can itself become a whole meal, certainly a hearty lunch, by adding another tier and doubling the fillings. Hey presto; a beastwich is born.

For those out there who like to take a more refined approach to their field dwelling and who like to eat good meals and aren't into drinking warm beer, you are going to have to plan ahead and put a bit of preparation in. Like a wise man said, any idiot can be uncomfortable, you're going to have to put some thought in to avoid it. It goes without saying that you will have a cooler box (that's an esky for our Aussie friends ;) So, freeze some of your milk the night before and it will work like freezer block. For the real piece de resistance, try knocking up a stew or chilli the night before and freezing that as well. Et voila, you have an edible cold block. Once you've eaten it you can use the space created to keep more beer cold. All good.

If you reach the point of ultimate refinement, you will have done all your shopping and pre-cooked all your meals a few days before you go away. The chances are you will have also got your board sorted and have already been away to the track and got it dialled. If you reach this point be careful as it can only lead to one place: you become an orange-juice drinking going-to-bed-early sports person. It's far better to keep some spontaneity around your mountainboard eventing. Do a bit of cooking- freeze it if you have time, get some shopping done if it fits, but don't worry if you don't -there's always the garage and burger van. I'm sure if you get to the campsite (having just checked the weather and thrown your boards and tent in the car and hit the road with nothing more than a Mars bar and some beer grabbed from the fridge) all will be fine and dandy; it's all keeping the right amount of slack in your life, and you'll wish you had one of these:

Here's a recipe combo suggestion to give you some inspiration for that perfect campsite dinner to make everyone impressed/jealous...

Beer bread

2 cups of self raising flour
1 big bottle of yeasty beer (eg not lager)
1 tbsp of butter, marge or oil
a pinch of salt
1) Mix all the ingredients together and knead into a soft doughy ball.
2) Wrap (not too tightly) in tin foil.
3) Stick it on the edge of your fire.
4) Check regulary after 15 mins. Beer bread is ready if it sounds hollow when tapped.

Simple stew

1 onion
1 carrot
1 red pepper
Handful of mushrooms
2 tins of stewing steak
1 large tin of new potatoes
red wine / beer
Salt and pepper and mixed herbs
Gravy Granules
1) Chop veggies.
2) Throw into a big pot and cook until softened (approx 5 mins).
3) Add two tins of stewing steak, wine/ beer, salt and pepper, plus some mixed herbs if you've got 'em.
5) leave to cook for 20 mins, stirring occasionally.
6) Add a tbsp or so of gravy granules, stir until thickened.
7) Trough heartily :D

Check out a load of easy camping recipes with names like "Corned Beef Mush" and "Boozy Nana's" here.

And some really great tips on all things camping here.

Have fun peeps, and remember:

words & pics by Smilie & Wil